Take the challenge...

I know this may come as a shock to a few people, but during my time here in England I’ve read a few books.  Surprising, I know.  One of the books I recently finished is When Religion Becomes Evil by Charles Kimball.  It’s a really interesting book, and I would definitely recommend it.  Now I’m not smart enough to take in or understand all that Kimball talks about, but I was able to get a lot out of it. 

Towards the end of the book Kimball introduces an image of a spiritual compass.  One part of the compass is its emphasis on practice in daily life.  The points on this compass have less to do with the structured belief systems and more to do with how we orient ourselves in the world.  For Kimball, he says, “It is the difference between thinking of my Christian identity in terms of a noun or an adjective.”  He furthers this thought with a story.  Kimball tells about a time when an Arabic-speaking Muslim he’d met during his travels to the Middle East asked him, “Are you Christian?”  Kimball assumed he meant “a Christian” and just forgot the indefinite article, so he answered “Yes.”  Kimball thought about this question later that day, and it really bothered him.  He asked himself, “Am I ‘Christian’ in my attitudes and behaviors?”  He came to the conclusion that it is easier to say “I am a Christian,” but it is much more powerful and meaningful if you are able to say “I am Christian.”

It seems like such a small difference, but it is true.  There is power in saying “I’m Christian” and leaving off the indefinite article.  It creates ownership and pride.  It’s like you are saying you and being Christian are one.  It’s not just a group you are a part of or identify with.  It’s not just something you do on Sundays.  It is who you are.  It lives in you.  It guides you in what you do in your day to day life.  Some may describe themselves as a mother, a son, a teacher, a Clemson fan, a friend, or any combination of these and much more.  These are all characteristics of ourselves, and we will identify with other mothers or Clemson fans.  When we say “I am a Christian,” it is saying this is a group we identify with.  When we say, “I’m Christian,” we are acknowledging that this is who we are, and that it fully impacts how we are a mother, a son, a Clemson fan, and a friend.  It completely invades every aspect of our life and makes us who we are. 

I feel that it is natural to answer a question about your faith or beliefs by saying, “I am a Christian,” I just ask that you think twice about it and what it means.  If you don’t think that you are able to say “I’m Christian,” ask yourself why not.  What is it about your life, what you do, who you are, that you aren’t confident enough to claim your beliefs as the essence of who you are?  If you have an answer, and you acknowledge the problem, try to change it.  It’s hard.  None of us are perfect.  When you make the step and conscience decision to say, “I’m Christian,” you should take it as a challenge for yourself.  A challenge to make sure that your beliefs and the teachings of Jesus are infiltrating every aspect of your life.

So the real question is – Do you consider yourself a Christian or are you Christian?  If you said, “I’m a Christian” - Take the challenge.  Let your faith be who you are.

More God, Less Church...

Today I was having a conversation with someone.  The conversation skipped around to a few different topics, but self care was one of the main ones.  We were talking about how before we could help fill others spiritually we had to be able to fill ourselves.  The person I was talking to said, “I need more God in my life, and less church.”

The reference was to spending a great deal of time doing work in the church and not spending enough time with God.  Irony?  I think so.  The person I was talking to is very involved in their church community, and to an outsider, you might be surprised to hear them say this, but I totally understood.   I think it’s something that a lot of people need to be reminded of.

A big reason for me applying and wanting to do YAGM this year was to further discern a call to public ministry.  I wanted to have more experience working in a church, and see if I could see myself doing this as a career.  My position as youth worker at St. Thomas has opened my eyes to many things, the good and the bad, as far as working in a church.  One trait that I’ve thought about, that might be seen as a negative, is the idea of enjoying the services I’m not involved in.  Now don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love what I do here, but I do enjoy the services that I am not holding a leadership roll.  Most Sundays I leave the service about fifteen minutes in to go lead Bell Towers.  This is Sunday Club for the high schoolers.  I have enjoyed putting these lessons together, and growing my relationship with these youth, but I have also learned to appreciate the services where I am just a part of the congregation.  Where I am able just to sit and take it all in.

Think about yourself and your involvement at your church.  Are you over involved?  Are you volunteering to be a part of committees, helping out with the youth, and going above and beyond the call of duty?  These are all great things, and ones that should be celebrated, but to really serve others, and help others grow in their faith, we have to be serving ourselves spiritually.  Don’t think I am taking away from all of the great work that you do for your church and community.  What I am saying is make sure you are taking time for yourself.  I understand this isn’t natural.  We want to give, and it’s hard to be “selfish” with our time, but we have to realize it will make us better and healthier in the long run.

This isn’t easy to write or talk about because I’m in the same boat.  You get where you're comfortable and you stay there, or you can’t say no and before you know it you’re so busy with church things there is no time for God.  I hope that just pointing this out doesn’t cut down on the amount of things you're involved in, or hinder you from getting involved in different ways.  What I do hope it does is it makes you think about taking a small part of your day or week for you.  Time set aside for you to grow closer to God.  Not for anyone else but yourself.  Be selfish sometimes.  It’s healthy.

It's so simple...

This weekend was the Parish weekend away.  Ninety-five people from St. Thomas and St. Luke’s travelled to Abbot Hall, a hotel and conference center in Grange-Over-Sands.  It really was a great weekend.  The youth had their own teaching sessions, separate from the adults.  The 1-10 year olds were in one group, and the 11-16 year olds were in my group.  Kirsty, a member of St. Thomas that is the same age as me, she helps out with Youth Alpha and the Thursday lunch group as well, came along this weekend and worked with the older youth with me.   It really was a tremendous weekend, and such a great experience as far as growing relationships with many of the youth.  There were 10 youth in Kirsty and my group.

Prior to the weekend, Kirsty and I had looked at the list of youth in our group and made assumptions about how it would go and how the group dynamics would work.  I expected it to be a good weekend, but I set my expectations far too low. 

We arrived Friday afternoon, had tea, and a teaching session.  It was a little crazy with everyone arriving, the session was cut a bit short, and  it was just a bit hectic, but it went alright.  On Saturday we had breakfast, our second session, a tea/coffee break, our third session, then lunch.  During our first session Saturday morning Kirsty and I’s group talked about serving others.  We made 31 goodie bags for the children at a local school in Ashton that is catered towards children with physical and mental disabilities.  It was so great to see the group come together and put these little gift bags together.  Our second session of the morning was about having fun.  We talked about how God gave us the ability to laugh and smile and how we should enjoy life, his creation, and the gifts he has given us.  We played a few games and just enjoyed each other’s company.  It was so much fun!  That afternoon at lunch, our entire group ended up all sitting at the same table.  A few of us started a table and then we kept adding to it.  We were sneaking extra chairs over, and pinching the place settings from other tables.  A table that was meant to seat 8 was now seating 12.  One of the servers came and asked if we would like for them to set the table for 12 for tea.  She might have been being a bit sarcastic out of frustration that we had moved things around, but we said “Yes please!”  For the next three meals, Saturday tea, Sunday breakfast, and Sunday lunch, we all sat as a group at the same table. 

There was one youth who had come on this weekend away with his mom and grandmother.  I had never met him before, and he seemed very hesitant during the first session.  He didn’t attend any of the other sessions we had throughout the weekend.  This was a little disheartening, but when I think about what is really important, I realize that he shared these meals with the group.  He broke bread with all of us.  He was engaged in conversation and was accepted into the group like he had been there the entire time.

Kirsty and I tried to make the sessions interactive and fun, but no matter how much the group talked during a session, it really never compared to the conversations we had during our meals.  We talked about movies, school, hopes, dreams, likes, dislikes, and everything in between.  We had an entire meal full of riddles and another full of “Would you rather?”  It really was a great experience and a tremendous addition to our weekend.

My campus pastor at Clemson, PC, always pointed out the significance of sharing a meal together.  During our Wednesday night weekly gatherings we always had a meal.  He would say that when you share a meal, you not only share the food, but you share the table and the conversation.  It wasn’t until the drive home this weekend that I realized the significance that sharing those meals with the youth had on our relationships.  PC’s basis for this line of thought is biblically based.  If we look at many of the major stories and times when Jesus was teaching, they were, more often than not, shared over a meal.  This time of community was very important to Jesus’ ministry here on earth.  Maybe we should make it more of a part of our ministry.  The best conversations and the way that I have grown closest with the people here in Ashton have been through the sharing of a meal.  It is such an intimate setting.  To me, when I’ve shared a meal with a family, it is like being invited not only into their home, but into their family.  Likewise, at LCM on a Wednesday night, you never knew who all was going to sit at your table, and it was rarely ever the same exact group each week.  The personalities were different, the topics were different, but you all grew closer just the same.  Also, my mom has helped a great deal with GAIHN (Greenville Area Interfaith Hospitality Network), a program for homeless families.  She will volunteer to prepare a meal during the week that Trinity hosts it.  An important part of this ministry isn’t just preparing the meal, but you also share the meals with the families.  Some of the most amazing stories that she would share weren’t about serving these people that were less fortunate, but it was about the stories that were told while they were eating together.

This weekend was amazing, and I really do think that these meals that Kirsty and I shared with the youth had a huge impact on this, but it has an impact on us all.  Sharing a meal together is such an amazing yet simple thing to do.  My challenge to you is to embrace this.  Is there someone new at work or at your church that you’d like to get to know?  Invite them for a meal.  You’ll be amazed at just how blessed your time will be.

A Book of Love...

Last Saturday night I had tea at Paul and Lynn’s.  They are a couple in the church with two of the most adorable little girls ever.  It was a great night.  The conversation during the night varied from their trips to America, dreams, aspirations, faith, and everything in between.

At some point in the conversation we, Paul, Lynn, Jonty, and I, got to talking about C.S. Lewis and The Chronicles of Narnia.  Now I know that Harry Potter is different and it is not meant to have parallels with Christianity, but I am always amazed that people will support one and absolutely hate the other.  I could go into a big long discussion about this, but I won’t do that to you.  The point is that I brought this up, the comparison of Harry Potter and Narnia.  This led to the four of us looking at a lot of issues and viewpoints held by many Christians.  I mentioned that there are some churches, where I’m from, where women aren’t allowed to teach a Sunday school class if men attend it.  These same churches obviously wouldn’t agree with women becoming ordained either.  Now none of these topics, or the details of these are really important, it was what Paul said when we were trying to figure out how some people can believe certain things and where they could find their backing in scripture.  Paul said, “It’s really just a book of love.”  He was referring to the Bible.  We can sit for hours and nit-pick loads of things out of it, but it really is just a book of love.

I am constantly surprised when comments like this hit me.  Here we are, having just finished our tea, enjoying a few beers, talking, disagreeing, agreeing, and having this great conversation when Paul says this.  I almost immediately wanted to write it on my hand so that I wouldn’t forget it.  As soon as I got home that night, I wrote it down in my journal, and I have now had a week to reflect on it.   Still, a week later, I’m blown away by this.  Now I’m not sure Paul realizes this, but it just makes me smile when I think about it.  I think it is the simplicity of it.

I have thought about going to seminary and it is something that is constantly on my mind.  How do you think my professors would like it if they were asking me this deep question about analyzing a piece scripture and my response was, “Is that really important?  It’s a book of love and that’s all that matters.”  I don’t think they would be so thrilled.  It’s when things are put so simply that they hit you in a way you wouldn’t expect.

I think when we are looking at the details of faith and struggling with what God is telling us through scripture, how we should treat people, whether certain people should become ordained, who is going to heaven, who is going to hell, and various other struggles that people have, we get too bogged down.  But does it really matter?  It’s just a book of love.  Shouldn’t we just...I don’t know...love?  Shouldn’t that be our focus?  No matter their race, sexual orientation, faith, socio-economic status, nationality, or anything else, we should just do what Jesus says, and love.

The unknown is exciting...

My end date for my time here at St. Thomas is exactly 6 months from today, and six months from Tuesday, January 24, I will be home.  Wow.  That is crazy!  Don’t get me wrong, please don’t think I am counting down the days till I’m home, it is just a really strange place to be.  I’m officially halfway through my year.  Weird. 

This past week, during the TFG BIG Conference in Wales, we talked a lot about our time so far at our placements, as well as the next six months to come.  There was a lot of time for personal reflection as well as group discussions.  During these times of personal reflection I was able to think back about what I’ve done over the past months and then also think about what I hope to accomplish before I leave.  I think it was really helpful to do this, because I don't want to realize I only have one month left with no time to change things.  I know I still have time to make a difference, but I know that it's going to fly by, so I better work fast.  It was great having these conversations with other volunteers, but somehow my thinking and the conversations with the other YAGMs always came back to, “What are you doing once you get back?”

This isn’t something that any of us had a good answer for.  We all seemed to be in this state of limbo, where we were struggling with how to properly handle the future while at the same time having our main focus be at our placement and on the work that we are here to do.  On top of this we all seemed to, in one way or another, struggle with where we saw God calling us.  Some are looking at possibly public ministry and ordination, some are thinking of spending another year volunteering in England, some are looking for full time employment back in the states, and some are just all together too overwhelmed to think about it.

All of our placements have had such different impacts on our lives so far and will continue to do so.  These impacts that they have had have changed where many of us see ourselves come August 2012.  Many of us had a plans for after our year of volunteering before we even left the US, but now that we're here, it has changed.  Whether we are in a church working with youth, a community center working with those with special needs, or traveling around putting on Christian assemblies at various schools, we have all been changed.  When I think to how much I have changed so far, the next six months are almost scary.  What should I expect?  I know that no matter the expectations that I set for the rest of my time here or plans I have for when I'm back in the US, God will find some way to throw them out the window as if he were saying to me, “Don’t try to confine me to this box of expectations, because I will blow them out of the water.”  My dad always said the best way to make God laugh is to say you have your life planned.

During all of these discussions about the next six months, the time after that, and the fear and uncertainty it brings, someone in our group, a fellow YAGM, shared this quote,

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.”

The story of my year here in England didn’t start when I arrived in August, and it won’t end when I am back in Greenville come July.  I have no idea where I am in the story, but I sure am excited to ride the ride, and see what it has in store.  I may not have all of the answers, my expectations and "plan" may be completely wrong, and I will change (that's for sure), but it will all be worth it.  It will be fun!  Here's to the next six months!

Here are some pictures from the conference in Wales.  We were able to go for a walk on Wednesday afternoon.  It was a bit overcast, but it was still a lot of fun.  In the first picture you will see eight of the ten YAGMs that are here in the UK.

 

 

Happy New Year!

Hello to all from across the pond!  I am so sorry I’ve disappeared for a while, but I’m back.  December was really busy, as you would expect working in a church, and the day after Christmas my boyfriend, Parker, came to visit.  He left on a Tuesday, and my best friend, Jennifer, arrived the next day.  So needless to say, I have been a bit busy with travelling and catching up.  Having these two here to visit was amazing!  We have been able to keep in touch through email, Facebook, and Skype, but it was great to spend time with them and show them where I've been these past five months.

So, as you can guess I have loads of stories to tell.  I could have an entire blog with stories from my travels the past three weeks, but I figured the best way to come back from the New Year would be an update on my chippy.  This update has three parts...

I’ve been asked by many here in Ashton whether I’ve tried other chippies to see if I really like mine the best.  My response was always, “I don’t need to try others.  I know mine is the best.”  Well, this was put to the test when Parker was here.  One afternoon we decided to go out for fish and chips for lunch.  Sadly, my chippy was closed.  During the week between Christmas and New Years it was closed.  So, Parker and I decided to try a different chippy in Ashton.  We got it to go, took it back to the house, and enjoyed...or not.  The chips were too soft, and the fish just didn’t taste as good.  So to all those who have asked or wondered if I have tested other chippies, I’ve tested one, and I was not impressed.

So this second part occurred when Jennifer (JJ) was visiting.  Now, as you know, I normally go to Jack Spratts for Lunch on Fridays, but Jennifer and I went to Liverpool for the day on Friday, so I made an exception.  This was, after all, going to be her only opportunity to eat there.  We headed to Jack Spratts before Drop In for our Friday tea.  I also usually get mine to go, but we decided to sit in and eat.  The girl came and took our order, and Jennifer and I started to chat it up as usual.  When the girl brought our food  to the table she asked, “Do you know Alyson Holden?”  I said “Yes, I’m living with the Holden’s this year.”  She knew the Holden’s and knew they had an American living with them.  She then left and JJ and I carried on.  Then the cook, Bob (I only know his name cause I’ve heard the waitresses say it), said “are those two American accents I hear?”  So we began to chat with Bob, and apparently he has a sister who lives in the north east in the U.S.  I told him that I come in every Friday for lunch.   JJ and I had a pleasant tea, she enjoyed her fish and chips, and I was so excited to have had an actual conversation with Bob.

The last addition to this saga happened this past Friday.  JJ left Friday morning, and I was exhausted.  I had actually considered not going for my fish and chips, but thank goodness I did.  There were two girls behind the counter (I still haven’t learned their names), and they were helping this one man, when one of them turned and said “½ a cod right?”  I said, “Yes ma’am, light please.”  The second girl turns to her and says, “How do you know her order,” and the first girl’s response was, “Well she comes in every Friday for her dinner.”  Ha!  I have made my presence known!

“Are you here studying?”

“No, I’m doing a year of volunteer work here in Ashton at St. Thomas.”

“The church?”

“Yes, I’m working with the youth there.”

“Oh, interesting.  And you’re from Australia?” (This is a different girl from the previous Australia story – proof they were talking about me)

“No, I’m from the U.S.”

“Oh, I’m dead obsessed with the U.S.  I hope to go there someday.  Where are you from in the U.S?”

“South Carolina, it’s two up from Florida.”

“I’ve got family in California” says the other customer waiting on his fish and chips.

“Oh, wow, I’ve never been there.”

Bob then chimes in, “Oh I recognize you from the other night.”

“Yes sir, I try to come every Friday, but I do generally come for lunch.”

“Salt and vinegar?”

“Just salt please.” (Maybe next week she’ll remember that)

“There you go.  Ta love.”

“Thanks so much, have a great day and I’ll see you next Friday.”

Now, it may have taken a great deal longer than I would have intended, but I think I have officially made friends.  This was a great way to start off the new year.  I will, as always, keep you updated on how this relationship develops and grows.  I hope you all had a very merry Christmas and a happy New Year!  I have really appreciated all of your thoughts and prayers, and I’m glad to be back blogging, telling you about my experiences here is Ashton, or Ash-Vegas as some like to call it.

In other news...

I will be leaving tomorrow for Wales for my second conference with TFG (Time For God).  I will be there Monday through Thursday.  I am really excited because I have not yet been to Wales.

Also, here is one of the pictures I got in London.  I am currently having issues with my camera, and getting pictures off of it, but once I do, I will be sure to share some more with you from my travels after Christmas.

Busy busy Christmas time...

This has been a very busy time around the church, as I expected.  There are just so many things that are going on at St. Thomas and in Ashton, and I would love to tell you two of the stories that have stuck with me this week.

This past Sunday, December 11, was the “Dressing the Crib” service.  During this service there is a bit read from the Nativity story.  While the reading is going on, some of the children walk forward and bring the characters from the Nativity to place in the stable.  At the beginning of the service, all of the children that come in are dressed like any character from the nativity they want.  This was a bit crazy.  We had to find a Mary and a Joseph, as well as some shepherds, angels, and wise men.  Some children were very opinionated about their costumes, and some couldn’t have cared less.  Either way, keeping about 15 young children somewhat organized and semi-quiet was not a gift God gave me.  Don’t get me wrong, I love the little ones.  I think they are precious, but there’s a reason I went into secondary education and not elementary.  Once they started reading the story, I was in charge of keeping the children from running off – easier said than done.  I had a group of five angels, two of which were hitting me with the stars they had been given to carry, about ready to walk down the center aisle.  One of them looked at me and said, “Are you from America.”  I told her yes, and then her friend responded with, “I know why you’re here.”  I asked her why, and she said, “To talk about God.”  *Pause for dramatic effect*  This put a huge smile on my face and has stuck with me since then.  Yes, I am here to talk about God.  I have a long job description that was compiled before I got here, and was edited a bit during my first few weeks here, but I think we should have just come to this girl from the very beginning.  I am here to talk about God, but not only through my words, but through my actions.  This is something that I think we can all be reminded of.  Who we say we are, what we say we stand for, people are noticing.  Let’s hope it’s for good reasons.

My second story is not nearly as touching, doesn’t involve little five year olds dressed up as angels, or huge epiphanies that will stay with me for years to come, but it does involve my chippy.  This past Friday I went out for my normal Friday fish and chips.  I was a bit later getting to Jack Spratts because I had run a few errands in Ashton, so there was no line.  Two of the girls that normally work the counter were in the sitting area eating their lunch.  The lady who took my order is the owner I’m pretty sure.  Regardless she took my order then went to fix it.  One of the girls that was eating her lunch came to the counter and said, “Are you American?”  I told her yes, and she said “She thought you were Australian.”  She was referring to the other young girl that was working with her.  My thought was really?  Australian?  WAIT, these people have an opinion on me?! 

“No, I’m not Australian, but that would be really cool.”

“Yeah she (pointing at the other girl she was working with) saw you yesterday outside and told me, ‘she has a well cool accent.’  I totally told her you were American.”

So not only have they noticed, they’re talking about me behind my back?!  This is awesome!

“Yup, born and raised.”

“Where are you from?”

“South Carolina, it’s two up from Florida.”

“Oh cool.  I’ve been to Florida twice.”

We continued to talk until my lunch was ready.  I had to let them know that I wanted just salt no vinegar, wrapped together, no need for a bag, but we’ll work on those minor details.  But SERIOUSLY?!  All this time, they’ve just assumed I was Australian?  Well, regardless, I’m hoping this is the start of something new.  I have one last trip this Friday and then it will be two weeks before I see them again.  I’m really hoping that all this progress doesn’t go to waste.